#TeamICan'tShootButICanRun

Oh crap! It's not just zombies. Now there are Vampires on the loose!

Mon, 11 Jun 2012 20:01:14 -0400

Ok, I’m pretty prepared for a zombie apocalypse, but now there are reports of a Vampire attack in San Diego! Holy crap! I don’t think my zombie survival training will work for vampires - those sons of bitches can do all kinds of crazy things like jump high and run fast. Guess it’s time to start stocking up on silver bullets and crucifixes. Can someone please point me in the direction of the nearest Catholic church? I need to brush up on my anti-vampire prayers.

Check out the Huffington Post article on the vampire attack.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/06/11/man-with-vampire-teeth-attack-homeless-man-california_n_1588281.html?ncid=edlinkusaolp00000003

Center for Disease Control (CDC) may know something we don't know...

Mon, 11 Jun 2012 09:59:00 -0400

Even the CDC is in on the Zombie Apocalypse Survival Preparedness bandwagon. Check out their Preparedness 101: Zombie Apocalypse tips on the CDC Website. A few of their survive necessities include:

Water (1 gallon per person per day)
Food (stock up on non-perishable items that you eat regularly)
Medications (this includes prescription and non-prescription meds)
Tools and Supplies (utility knife, duct tape, battery powered radio, etc.)
Sanitation and Hygiene (household bleach, soap, towels, etc.)
Clothing and Bedding (a change of clothes for each family member and blankets)
Important documents (copies of your driver’s license, passport, and birth certificate to name a few)
First Aid supplies (although you’re a goner if a zombie bites you, you can use these supplies to treat basic cuts and lacerations that you might get during a tornado orhurricane)

Want to survive the coming zombie apocalypse? Do this workout 3...

Sat, 09 Jun 2012 16:23:46 -0400

Want to survive the coming zombie apocalypse? Do this workout 3 times a day. It will also probably give you ripped abs and Michelle Obama arms, too. Try it, you’ll hate me, but you’ll thank me when you survive.

I'm out of commission for a while

Thu, 31 May 2012 14:28:58 -0400

I’ve been posting lots of news stories this week because, well, it’s not every week people are biting each other’s faces off. But I’m also unable to do any zombie survival training this week because I had my wisdom teeth taken out on Tuesday and I look and feel like I’ve been sucker punched by the Hulk. So, instead of going AWOL for the week, I thought I’d keep you abreast of the latest zombie news. I hope you’ve been enjoying the blog this week, but have no fear! Training is back on as soon as I no longer look like a drugged chipmunk.

More face-eating zombies in Florida

Thu, 31 May 2012 06:13:01 -0400

After reading this article about a Daytona, FL man biting the lips off a kitten, I’m more convinced than ever that there is a zombie breakout happening in Florida. First, a naked man ravages the face of another man after taking LSD. Now, a psycho admits to biting the lips off a kitten and strangling another one after his girlfriend dumps him.

Ok Florida, what the hell is going on down there? Is the water contaminated, has NASA had an experiment go extremely wrong, is all the humidity and swamp water finally getting to you? What Florida? What is wrong with you that a zombie apocalypse is over taking your state?

Read the article about the kitten-eating man at http://www.news-journalonline.com/breakingnews/2012/05/palm.html

Has the Zombie Apocalypse begun?

Tue, 29 May 2012 12:08:14 -0400

On Sunday, I reported that a guy in Miami was caught trying to eat some guy’s face off. Now, reports are saying that he was under the influence of “Bath Salts” a new form of LSD.

So, is this the “virus” that ultimately starts the zombie takeover (Z-day)? Thank goodness we’ve been training…just in case.

I think it should be noted that the guy was killed after several gun shots. After he was shot once, he continued to gnaw at the other guy’s face so if this is a zombie takeover, we should be prepared with plenty of ammo. Got your guns ladies?

Watch a news report about the Zombie incident and decide for yourself.

Z-Day, Face-eating men, and Ben & Jerry's

Sun, 27 May 2012 23:56:29 -0400

I just ran the hardest I’ve ever ran in my entire life. As long as zombies can run a straight 30 min, I should be OK for at least the first week of Z-Day.

Speaking of flesh-eating zombies…did you see this article about some dude eating another guy’s face? That’s some hardcore zombie shit. Fortunately, a police officer was able to get the attacker away from the injured man by shooting the guy. Basically what we learn from this incident is to always travel with a cop during a zombie take over and make sure to never let anyone get near your face; apparently it looks like lunch.

In other news, while I’m eating 1200 calories to prepare for a food shortage crisis, my other half is trying to bulk up so he’s on a 4,000 calorie/day food regime. The worst part? He’s bitching about having to eat so much. I would LOVE to be able to eat 4,000 calories per day and not turn into a beached whale. Do you know how many tubs of Ben & Jerry’s that is??? So, Nadir. How about you STFU about being forced to eat so much.

That’s all the news for today. Keep up the great work! Remember, you’re beautiful, strong and we’re gonna survive together!!! Go #TeamICantShootButICanRun

Cardio it is!

Mon, 21 May 2012 12:17:46 -0400

Ok, so my zombie survival training is also training for a zombie 5k in late August. This week, I’m back to zombie survival basics…cardio. Mark my words, by the end of this week, I’ll be able to run/jog 5 miles.

Speaking of running from zombies, did you know that there’s a song called Running from Zombies? It’s by Tom Brosseau - whoever the heck that is. It’s slow, but it doesn’t suck. Here it is for your listening pleasure.

Now get out there and RUN! Remember, you are amazing, beautiful and awesome! We’re gonna survive together. Go #TeamICan’tShootButICanRun!

Think you can survive the zombie apocalypse? Check your skills...

Thu, 17 May 2012 13:40:40 -0400

Think you can survive the zombie apocalypse? Check your skills with this interactive zombie video.

I didn't give up!

Mon, 14 May 2012 14:11:42 -0400

Oooops, I kinda forgot to post anything last week. Sorry. I promise I didn’t give up on my zombie apocalypse training; did you? I’ll be back a little later today with a zombie clip/workout challenge.

Remember, you’re beautiful, strong and we’re gonna survive together! Go #TeamICantShootButICanRun!

Stuff you need to survive the zombie apocalypse

Tue, 08 May 2012 13:27:33 -0400

Stuff you need to survive the zombie apocalypse:

I’d assume for a zombie apocalypse you’d need to multiply this list by at least 20. But hey, it’s your call.

All this zombie training has me ridiculously sore. Enough of my...

Thu, 03 May 2012 16:59:00 -0400

All this zombie training has me ridiculously sore. Enough of my complaining, how about some pictures from my adventure at the shooting range? On Tuesday, I went to Wade’s Eastside Guns to practice my zombie hunting skills because it’s Ladies Day and I got 1/2 price lane fee + a free gun to shoot. I managed to kill the zombie, but I could definitely use more practice.

Here are some fun pictures from my Zombie shooting spree.

Yeah, I’m a badass zombie killer. Try to take my gun; I...

Tue, 01 May 2012 19:53:00 -0400

Yeah, I’m a badass zombie killer. Try to take my gun; I dare you!

How to fight a gun out of a zombie/enemy's hands

Tue, 01 May 2012 01:58:41 -0400

Ok, so this week’s survival skill will get us in the trenches of zombie survival. This week, we will train to acquire the skills necessary to fight a gun out of the hands of a zombie or an enemy. Watch the video clip below to learn why it’s so important to learn this skill.

Get in the Cellar
Night of the Living Dead at MOVIECLIPS.com

By the end of the 2 minute clip, the guy who started out with the gun gets shot, then he gets turned into a zombie, then his zombie daughter murders her mother in cold blood all because he couldn’t fight his gun out of the hands of his enemy. YOU are going to learn how to survive by learning how to get your gun away from any SOB who tries to take it from you.

Be prepared for lots of upper body training this week and keep working on your cardio. Remember, we want to be at AT LEAST 5 miles by the end of our survival training.

Remember, you are beautiful, amazing and we are going to survive together! Go #TeamICan’tShootButICanRun!

Zombie Shoot Out

Sun, 29 Apr 2012 19:08:56 -0400

Zombie Shoot Out:

Zombie shoot out? Hell yes!

Holla! I ran/jog/walked 2 whole miles today. Oh, did I mention that I have heart problems? Yeah,...

Sat, 28 Apr 2012 00:02:50 -0400

Holla! I ran/jog/walked 2 whole miles today. Oh, did I mention that I have heart problems? Yeah, #TeamICan’tShootButICanRun makes no excuses.

Remember, you are beautiful, amazing and more badass than anyone I know. Let’s get out there and survive together!

Woot woot! Finished a whole mile!

Wed, 25 Apr 2012 14:38:48 -0400

Woot woot! Finished a whole mile!

Quick Check In

Wed, 25 Apr 2012 13:16:53 -0400

Yesterday, I ran a solid half mile at a 4mph pace. If zombies can only run 1/2 a mile, I’m golden! Today is all about upper body. My fiance and I are hitting the gym together where we’ll be throwing the medicine ball at each other to practice throwing things at oncoming zombies. We’re also gonna do a lot of weight training to give us the strength to fight of zombies when the time comes.

We’re looking for a rock star boxing or kickboxing class in Seattle. Know of any?

I'm Dead

Mon, 23 Apr 2012 16:03:44 -0400

Thank goodness I have time to train for the Zombies or else I would be dead by now. Today I ran to find my baseline. Well, I didn’t do so hot.

The first lap was OK, I ran .25 miles at a 6mph pace, but then I quickly got worn out. I slowed to a 3mph and walked the next half lap, but then I got bored so I picked up the pace and jogged the next half lap at a 4.5 mph pace.

I ran the half mile with an average pace of 4.1mph. I wasn’t super worn out by the end of the half mile, and I think the 4.5mph is a good pace for me, but I was so freaking bored just running in place. Maybe I should get a recording of zombies to listen to while I run to keep me motivated.

Tomorrow, I’m pushing through and going for the full mile at a 4.5mph pace, plus adding in some upper body strength training.

Go #TeamICan’tShootButICanRun !

Survival Technique #1 - Cardio

Mon, 23 Apr 2012 12:53:22 -0400

We’re starting off our Zombie Survival Challenge with a tip from one of the funniest zombie movies, Zombieland. In the movie, the main character, Columbus, shares his rules for surviving Zombieland.

His #1 rule? Cardio. This rule was part of the inspiration behind this blog. I hate running on the treadmill, so every time I do I simply pretend that zombies are chasing me and I have to outrun them which led to the hashtag #TeamICan’tShootButICanRun.

Survival technique #1, cardio. Depending on the type of outbreak that causes a Zombie infestation, zombies could be quick little buggers or slow as molasses. I’m going to prepare for quick, agile zombies with lots of stamina; I encourage you to do the same. Also, you might have to do lots of running to gather supplies for you and your loved ones so being able to run will greatly increase your odds of survival. Don’t forget, while you’re running there is most likely going to be stuff in your way that you have to throw or push to clear a path so we also need to work on upper body strength this week.

By the end of the 30 day Zombie Survival Challenge, I hope to be able to run a full 5 miles at a fairly decent pace, so this week I’m working on building stamina, next week it’s all about speed. Today, I’m checking in with my baseline speed and ability to run a mile. I’ll use this to build on over the coming week. Tomorrow, I’ll add in some upper and lower body strength training.

Let’s work together to kick some zombie butt; or at least out run some zombie butt! Remember, you are beautiful, you are perfect and we are going to survive together! Go #TeamICan’tShootButICanRun !